Found myself standing in the Hallmark aisle yesterday for twenty minutes trying to pick thank you cards. Twenty minutes. For cards.
The problem isn't finding the right cards. Problem is I've been avoiding this for weeks and now it feels like this huge thing I've built up in my head.
Janet hit ten years in nursery last month. Just mentioned it while we're cleaning up after service. "Ten years this month," she said, tossing wipes in the trash. Like it was nothing.
Ten years. And I'm just now finding out because she happened to mention it.
That's messed up, right? Someone gives a decade to your ministry and you miss it completely?
Been thinking about this a lot lately. How do you actually celebrate people without making it weird?
The Certificate Thing That Went Sideways
Last year I got this idea to make certificates. Looked up templates online, went to Office Depot, bought the fancy paper. Spent my whole Saturday designing these official-looking things.
Called people up during announcements. Made them stand there while I read their years of service and everyone clapped.
Sarah looked like she wanted to crawl under a pew. Found out later she hates being put on the spot like that. Almost made her quit volunteering.
Tom wasn't even there that Sunday. His certificate sat in my office for a month until I randomly saw him in the grocery store.
Turns out some people really don't want to be celebrated publicly. Seems obvious now but wasn't then.
Dinner Party Nobody Wanted
Planned this volunteer appreciation dinner at that Italian place downtown. Reserved the back room, made it fancy, invited everyone who'd served more than a year.
Ten people came. Out of maybe forty invitations.
Sitting in this private dining room that could seat thirty, looking at mostly empty tables, wondering what I did wrong.
Talked to people later. Saturday nights are terrible for families. Some volunteers work weekends. Others said they serve specifically because they don't want attention and appreciation dinners defeat the whole purpose.
Makes sense when you think about it. Some people volunteer to avoid being the center of attention, not to get honored for it.
Gift Card Weirdness
Started giving Target cards for milestone anniversaries. Seemed practical. Everyone shops at Target.
But it felt like paying people to volunteer. Which seemed wrong and probably sent weird messages about why people should serve.
Also how much do you spend? Twenty-five dollars? Fifty? How do you put a price on someone's service without insulting them?
One person told me she didn't want gift cards because it made volunteering feel like a job. "I serve because I want to, not for rewards."
Fair point.
Switched to buying pizza for whole teams instead of individual gifts. Felt less like payment, more like shared celebration.
Personal Notes I Never Write
Handwritten notes seemed perfect. Personal, thoughtful, mentioning specific things people do well.
Great idea if you actually write them.
I buy the cards with best intentions. They sit on my desk for weeks while I tell myself I'll write them tomorrow. Then I feel guilty about not writing them. Then I avoid them because I feel guilty.
It's stupid. Writing a thank you note takes five minutes. But somehow I've turned it into this massive task that I keep putting off.
Started writing one note per week instead of trying to do them all at once. Much more manageable. People seem to like getting random appreciation throughout the year instead of mass recognition at specific times.
Still have a stack of blank cards though. They mock me daily.
The Anniversary I Almost Missed
Linda's been doing children's ministry for fifteen years. Fifteen. She basically created our current program, trained most of our volunteers, shows up every week no matter what.
Found out about her anniversary when she mentioned it while we're setting up chairs. "Fifteen years next week," she said casually.
Fifteen years and I almost missed it because I don't keep track of when people start serving.
Felt terrible. Here's someone who's given fifteen years to our ministry and I have no system for knowing about important milestones.
Made a spreadsheet that night. Not sophisticated but better than accidentally discovering anniversaries in random conversations.
Team Celebration vs Solo Recognition
Some people love being recognized individually. Others prefer team celebrations where they don't stand out.
Pizza party for the whole children's ministry team worked way better than individual certificates. Group photo for the newsletter, team recognition at staff meeting. People seemed comfortable being honored as part of their team.
But some volunteers really do want individual recognition. Especially long-term people who've been quietly faithful for years without much attention.
Learning to figure out what different people actually prefer instead of assuming one approach works for everyone.
Timing Problems
Annual volunteer banquets miss people all year long. Someone hits five years in March but has to wait until November dinner for recognition. By then it feels old and meaningless.
Started trying to recognize milestones closer to when they happen. Not perfect timing but way better than making people wait eight months for arbitrary appreciation events.
This requires actually knowing when milestones happen though, which brings us back to record-keeping issues I'm still working on.
What People Actually Want
Asked some long-term volunteers what kind of recognition they prefer.
Most said they just want to know their service makes a difference.
Specific feedback means more than generic appreciation. "Kids love how you tell Bible stories" hits different than "Thanks for helping."
Some feel recognized when you trust them with more responsibility. Others feel appreciated when you make their jobs easier.
Being flexible when life gets complicated shows appreciation better than formal awards sometimes.
And some people genuinely don't want recognition at all. They serve to serve, not to be thanked.
Small Stuff That Works
Remembering things about volunteers' lives outside church. Asking about their kids, their jobs, stuff they care about.
Helping them when they need help. Covering their shifts when they're sick, supporting them during hard times.
Including them in decisions about their areas of service. Asking their opinions, using their suggestions, treating them like partners instead of just helpers.
Public recognition for people who want it, private appreciation for people who don't.
Not taking their service for granted even when it becomes routine.
Resources That Get It
Some curriculum companies understand volunteer appreciation is about relationships, not just events.
Orange has volunteer engagement strategies focused on long-term care rather than annual gestures.
Kids Sunday School Place includes volunteer appreciation ideas for different personality types.
Group's DIG IN has team building resources that help volunteers feel valued ongoing.
Grow Curriculum approaches volunteer development with modern understanding of what motivates people.
Gospel Project connects volunteer care to spiritual growth instead of just saying thanks occasionally.
But best volunteer appreciation comes from knowing your specific people and what actually makes them feel valued.
What I Think I Know
Different people want different kinds of recognition. Some public, some private, some none at all.
Regular small appreciations work better than big annual events half the volunteers can't attend.
Personal connection beats generic appreciation every time. Knowing volunteers as people, not just roles they fill.
Timing matters. Recognize milestones when they happen instead of waiting for convenient schedules.
Treating volunteers well consistently means more than occasional formal recognition events.
Best appreciation might be creating an environment where volunteers feel valued and part of something meaningful rather than just thanked sometimes for showing up.
Still need to write those thank you notes sitting on my desk. Maybe tonight. Or tomorrow. Definitely soon though.
