Tried teaching honesty last week using Ananias and Sapphira.
They lied about money. Fell over dead.
Kids terrified. Will I die if I lie?
Probably not. But maybe don't lie.
Great job me. Now they think lying causes instant death.
The Death Story Was A Mistake
Ananias and Sapphira sold property. Lied about the price. Both dropped dead.
Jacob age seven asks if lying about eating cookies will kill him.
No. This was special situation.
What makes it special? Holy Spirit was there?
Holy Spirit is always there though right?
Yes but. Different kind of there.
Making no sense. Kids staring.
Emma asks if her mom knows about this story. Maybe shouldn't tell her mom.
Yeah maybe don't mention the death part to parents. Moving on.
Actually let's try different honesty story.
Jacob lied to Isaac pretending to be Esau. Got the blessing.
Kids: So lying worked?
Well he got blessing but then had to run away and hide for years.
So lying works short term but not long term?
Sure. That.
Jacob says his dad told him lying is always wrong no exceptions.
Your dad is right. Stick with that.
But Bible Jacob lied and became Israel and that's good right?
This lesson falling apart. Abandon ship.
Sharing Goldfish Crackers
Jesus fed five thousand people. Little boy shared his lunch.
Kids: If I share my lunch does Jesus make more?
Not exactly.
Then why share? I like my lunch.
Because sharing is kind and God likes kindness.
Emma says she shared her cookies once and kid threw them away. Sharing felt bad.
That does sound bad.
Jacob says maybe cookies weren't good cookies.
Emma says they were great cookies. Oreos.
Who throws away Oreos? Valid question.
Now everyone arguing about whether Oreos are good cookies.
Lost the thread completely. We were talking about sharing.
Kids don't remember. Moved on to talking about best cookies.
Gave up. Passed out goldfish crackers. Nobody shared them.
Irony not lost on me.
Good Samaritan Backfired
Taught Good Samaritan. Help people who need help.
Simple lesson. Clear message.
Next week Marcus tells me he got in trouble for helping.
What happened?
Saw kid fall on playground. Tried to help him up. Kid yelled leave me alone. Teacher thought they were fighting.
Oh no.
Got sent to principal. Had to explain he was being Good Samaritan.
Principal didn't care apparently.
So helping gets you in trouble? Marcus asks.
Not always. Sometimes. Depends.
This is confusing.
Yeah. Life is confusing sometimes.
Marcus not satisfied with that answer. Me neither honestly.
Emma asks if Good Samaritan got in trouble.
No. He was the hero of the story.
Then why did Marcus get in trouble?
Because real life is complicated and stories are simpler?
Kids staring at me like I've lost my mind. Maybe have.
Forgiveness Math
Jesus said forgive seventy times seven.
Kids immediately doing math. That's four hundred ninety.
Emma says if someone is mean four hundred ninety times maybe just stop being friends.
Cannot argue with that logic.
But Jesus said forgive that many times.
Jacob asks if you have to actually count.
No. It's about forgiving lots without keeping track.
But you just made us do math.
Don't do the math. It's a metaphor.
What's a metaphor?
Not getting into that today.
Emma asks if she has to forgive her brother who breaks her toys.
Yes probably.
Even if he does it on purpose?
Even then. But also tell your parents.
He says sorry but doesn't mean it.
Then. Hmm. Still forgive but also set boundaries?
What's boundaries?
Why did I bring this up. Out of my depth here.
Boundaries means you can forgive someone but still protect yourself from getting hurt again.
Emma processing this. Looks skeptical.
So I forgive him but hide my toys?
Sure. That works.
Marcus announces he's forgiving everyone right now. Four hundred ninety times. Done forever.
Wish forgiveness worked that way.
David Versus Fighting
David fought Goliath. Was brave. Trusted God.
Kids loved it. Going to be brave too.
Next week Marcus got in trouble for fighting bigger kid at recess.
Why Marcus why.
Wanted to be brave like David.
David didn't start the fight. Giant was threatening everyone.
Kid was being mean to Emma. I was protecting her.
Oh. That's. Actually kind of sweet but also no fighting.
Thought you said David fought the giant?
David fought actual giant who was threatening whole army. Different situation.
How is it different?
One is war situation. One is playground. Different rules.
Rules are confusing.
Yes. They are.
Emma asks if David got in trouble for fighting.
No. He became king.
See? Fighting worked for David.
Losing this battle. Pun intended.
Had to email parents explaining David and Goliath not instruction manual for playground conflicts.
Parents thought it was funny. I did not.
Job's Terrible Life
Job lost everything. Stayed faithful. Good lesson about patience.
Emma: Job's life sounds really bad.
It was very bad. But he didn't give up on God.
Why did God let all those bad things happen?
That's. That's the question scholars debate.
What's scholars?
Smart people who study stuff.
Are you a scholar?
No. I google things and hope for best.
Kids giggling.
But really why did bad things happen to Job?
Sometimes bad things happen and we don't know why. But God is still there.
Emma looks doubtful. Same honestly.
Jacob asks if he has to be patient like Job when his sister is annoying.
How annoying is she?
Really annoying. Uses my stuff without asking.
Maybe talk to your parents about it?
But should I be patient like Job?
Job level patience is very advanced. Start smaller.
Jacob relieved. Me too.
Joseph And His Terrible Brothers
Joseph's brothers sold him as slave. Later he forgave them.
Kids: Why would he forgive that?
Because family. And because God had plan.
His brothers sold him. As a slave.
Yes. Very terrible. But Joseph forgave.
I would not forgive that says Emma.
That's honest. Joseph was very forgiving person.
More forgiving than me.
More forgiving than most people.
Marcus asks if it's okay to forgive someone but not talk to them anymore.
Actually yes. Can forgive and still have boundaries.
There's that word again. What's boundaries?
Protecting yourself while still being kind. You don't have to be best friends with everyone you forgive.
Emma likes this. Can I forgive my brother but lock my door?
Sure. That's reasonable boundary.
Feel like accidentally taught something useful. Don't know how that happened.
Solomon's Confusing Wisdom
Solomon asked for wisdom. God gave wisdom and also riches.
Kids: So asking for wisdom gets you money?
In this story yes. But that's not the point.
What is the point?
Wisdom is valuable. More valuable than money even.
But he got money too so.
Yes. He did. Moving on.
What even is wisdom asks Emma.
Good choices. Understanding things.
I make good choices. Do I have wisdom?
Some. Working on more.
How do you get more wisdom?
Learning from mistakes mostly.
So messing up gives you wisdom?
Kind of yes.
Kids happy about this. They mess up a lot so getting very wise.
Actually that's kind of true. Sure. You're all very wise.
Ruth Stuck Around
Ruth stayed with Naomi even when hard.
Kids: What's that called?
Loyalty. Being faithful friend.
Oh like how I stay friends with Emma even when she's annoying says Marcus.
Emma right there. Not happy.
I'm not annoying.
Sometimes you are.
You're more annoying.
You're both annoying sometimes. Everyone is annoying sometimes.
Are you annoying? Asks Jacob.
Probably. Yes. Most people are annoying sometimes.
Ruth was probably annoying sometimes too. Still loyal though.
Kids giggling. Lesson saved maybe.
Esther Nearly Died
Esther approached king without permission. Could have died. Saved her people.
Emma: Would you do that?
Risk my life? Probably not honestly.
But you said Esther was brave.
She was. I'm not that brave.
So being brave is good but you're not brave?
Being brave is hard. Not everyone can do what Esther did.
Marcus asks if Esther was scared.
Probably terrified.
Then how was she brave?
Being brave means doing right thing even when scared.
Oh. So you can be scared and brave at same time?
Yes. Usually brave people are scared. That's what makes it brave.
This actually clicked. Finally.
What Worked Sort Of
Bible characters aren't perfect. Makes them relatable supposedly.
Connecting to real situations helps. When works. Often doesn't work.
Admitting don't have answers. Kids seem okay with that.
Letting them ask hard questions even when can't answer them.
What Didn't Work
Death stories. Too intense. Regret Ananias and Sapphira immediately.
Expecting kids to copy Bible heroes. They're kids not heroes.
Thinking lessons will go smoothly. They never go smoothly.
Having clear answers to moral questions. Nothing is clear.
Why Keep Trying
Kids need examples of good character. Bible has those.
Stories stick better than rules maybe.
Seeing flawed people try to be good gives hope. Don't have to be perfect.
Working through hard questions together teaches thinking.
The Truth
Character building is messy disaster most weeks.
Kids take wrong lessons from stories. David fought so I can fight.
Have to clarify constantly. Redirect constantly. Give up frequently.
But stories still better than nothing probably.
Kids see Bible people as real humans making real choices.
Maybe learn it's okay to be imperfect and trying anyway.
That's something.
Now need to teach Daniel and lions without kids thinking they should pet zoo animals.
Because that's definitely where this is going.
Maybe take break from animal stories.
Or take break from teaching character entirely.
That's option too.
