Pinterest is a liar. Those beautiful Sunday school crafts with perfect edges and coordinated colors? They're made by robots. Or people with way more patience than me. Because when I try to recreate them with actual children, everything turns into a glue-covered nightmare.
But somehow these kids keep learning stuff even when our crafts look like they were made during an earthquake. So here are the ones that actually work without requiring an art degree or the patience of a saint.
Paper plate everything because I'm lazy
Paper plates are my best friend. You can make literally anything out of paper plates and kids think you're a genius.
Last week we made "God's creation wheels" which sounds fancy but is basically just two paper plates with a window cut out of the top one. Kids drew different things God made on the bottom plate and then spun it around to show them through the window.
Did some of them draw cars and smartphones as things God created? Yes. Did I correct them? No. We'll work on theology later, right now we're just celebrating that they're engaged.
Tommy made his wheel backwards and couldn't figure out why it didn't work, so he just held it up and spun around himself instead. Problem solved. Kid's going places.
Cotton ball sheep that barely look like sheep
Every Sunday school teacher has made cotton ball sheep. It's like a rite of passage. Glue cotton balls onto paper, draw legs, call it a sheep.
Mine always look more like clouds with stick legs but kids don't care. While we're gluing cotton balls everywhere, we talk about how Jesus is the good shepherd and loves His sheep.
Sarah decided her sheep needed hair bows made out of more cotton balls. Emma's sheep got a whole cotton ball family. Mason's sheep was just... cotton balls. Everywhere. On the paper, on the table, on his face.
But they all remembered that Jesus takes care of us like a shepherd takes care of sheep. Even if our sheep look like abstract art.
Rock painting for people who can't paint
I buy cheap rocks from the dollar store and let kids paint them however they want. The original plan was to paint them to look like stones from David and Goliath's fight, but that lasted about five minutes.
Now they just paint rocks and we talk about how God can use ordinary things (like rocks or kids) to do extraordinary things. Deep, right?
Last month Emma painted hers bright pink with purple polka dots and declared it was the prettiest rock God ever made. Hard to argue with that logic.
Tommy painted his black and said it was "the rock of darkness" which sounds ominous but he seemed happy about it. Sometimes you just gotta roll with whatever they create.
Coffee filter rainbows that actually work
This is literally the only craft that turns out the way it's supposed to every single time. Coffee filters, washable markers, water. That's it.
Kids color the coffee filter with markers, you spray it with water, and the colors bleed together into this beautiful rainbow effect. It's like magic except it actually works.
While we're making them we talk about God's promises and how He gave us the rainbow as a sign that He keeps His word. Also how sometimes beautiful things come from mess, which is very relatable when you're watching kids create chaos with markers.
Handprint everything because parents love it
Parents go crazy for handprint crafts. I don't understand it but I'm not questioning it.
Handprint trees, handprint flowers, handprint animals, handprint rainbows. Just trace their hands and turn it into whatever fits your lesson.
My favorite is handprint hearts where they trace both hands overlapping to make a heart shape. We talk about how God's love fills our hearts and we can share that love with others by using our hands to help people.
Super cheesy but the kids eat it up. Plus parents stick these on their fridges for years so your lesson keeps teaching even at home.
Popsicle stick crosses that fall apart
This should be simple, right? Glue two popsicle sticks together in a cross shape. How hard could it be?
Apparently very hard because half of them fall apart before the kids even get home. But we talk about the cross while we're making them and somehow that sticks even if the glue doesn't.
Pro tip: use way more glue than you think you need. Like, a ridiculous amount of glue. It'll still fall apart but maybe not until Tuesday instead of immediately.
Some kids decorate theirs with stickers or markers. Others just want to make multiple crosses because more is better obviously. Let them go wild.
Tissue paper stained glass windows
Tape tissue paper squares to contact paper and stick it on a window. Boom, instant stained glass that looks surprisingly pretty.
We usually do this when talking about how Jesus is the light of the world. When the sun shines through their "stained glass" it makes beautiful colors everywhere.
The kids love picking out which colors to use and arguing about the best patterns. I love that it requires minimal supervision once they get started.
Fair warning: tissue paper gets everywhere. EVERYWHERE. You'll find bits of it in your hair three days later. But the windows look amazing and the kids feel so proud.
Seed planting for people who kill houseplants
Plant seeds in little cups and talk about how God makes things grow. This is supposed to teach about faith and how small things can become big things with God's care.
In reality, half the seeds die because kids either water them too much or forget to water them at all. But the ones that do grow become the most exciting thing ever.
"MY SEED HAS A BABY LEAF!" Emma screamed last week when she discovered her bean sprout. She's been checking on it every day and telling everyone about how God is helping it grow.
Use fast-growing seeds like beans or radishes. Kids need quick results or they lose interest. Also plant extras because some will definitely not make it.
Play dough Bible stories
I keep a big container of play dough and let kids make whatever they want while I tell Bible stories. They're listening even when it looks like they're not.
"Make something that shows God's love" usually results in hearts, flowers, and weird abstract blobs that they insist are meaningful.
Tommy made what he called "God's pet dinosaur" last week. I decided not to get into extinction timelines and just went with it. God probably would have liked dinosaurs.
Play dough is forgiving. If they mess up, just squish it back together and start over. Kind of like grace, actually.
Pipe cleaner people who look like aliens
Twist pipe cleaners into person shapes and you've got instant Bible character figures. They never look quite human but kids don't care.
We make Noah and his family, David and Goliath, Jesus and the disciples. The figures are wonky but the kids love acting out the stories with them.
Last month Sarah made a pipe cleaner Jesus with really long arms because "Jesus gives the best hugs." Theology might be questionable but the heart is right.
The truth about craft time
Here's what nobody tells you: the craft is never really the point. The point is the conversation that happens while little hands are busy creating.
While they're gluing cotton balls, they're asking questions about sheep and shepherds. While they're painting rocks, they're thinking about how God uses ordinary people. While they're making crosses, they're processing what Jesus did for us.
The craft gives them something to do with their hands while their hearts and minds work on bigger things. Even if the final product looks like it was made by caffeinated toddlers during an earthquake.
Also, everything will be covered in glue. Accept this now. Your clothes, the table, probably your hair. Glue is the price we pay for spiritual education.
But when little Emma takes home her wonky cotton ball sheep and tells her mom all about how Jesus loves her like a shepherd loves his sheep? That makes all the glue and chaos worth it.
Even if I'm still finding glitter in places glitter should never be two weeks later.
